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The Darty Experience

Posted by Nadil - Created: 16 years ago
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10 replies (Showing replies: 1 to 10)

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Posted by angel-187474 - 16 years ago

You're a devil in disguise MikeP!  I'm just about to head over downunder myself ... so I might beat you to 'em!

heh! heh! heh!

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Posted by MikeP-180526 - 16 years ago

You know, Angel,  I'd love to meet you .........you have such a great imagination and the ability to turn it into humorous verse!

I'd never even noticed that on the Lunch bar wrapper (and I eat one nearly every day) it says 'extra long and extra strong',  so I went back and looked at that 'embedded image' and noticed it for the first time.  I am wondering if that has been retouched,  I don't think the real ones have that, but I shall look this evening when I get home!

And if you don't know what a Lunch Bar is - and I'm purely referring to the cholcolate and not make any crude aspersions - you don't know what you're missing.  As you made me laugh, I'll share my last box of them with you (I bring them back in bulk!).  Or at least,  I'll put one in the post to you!


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Posted by angel-187474 - 16 years ago

Oh GOD !  ... Re that embedded image ...Don’t tell me we’re still using sex to sell chocolate ??!#!?<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />


Back in the land downunder

where laughter rings louder

than a blunder,

There’s nothing so good

as a vegemite fight

between mate

and his potential new number.


There is but one dream

for the young Aussie bloke

That’s to discover the secret of manhood

before he’s as old as the pope!


It went out with the eighties

the selling of sex

but for the Ozzie come-latelys

it rolls in the cheques!


“It lies in the chocolate”

say the masters of con

“Scientifically proven and healthy to boot,

try our Cadburys lunch bar – it’s a real hoot!”


Extra long ‘n extra strong

for those men amongst the boys

The test of time requires Stamina

not the call for extra toys!


Peanuts, coconut, marajuana,

it’s quite an exotic blend

Steroids , cinnamon, and Guarana!

Where ever does it end?

Packagers of hope - it’s positively laden with bloody dope!


So it might just be safer

to go out and buy the little browner

simply on the wager

you end up with a downer!


It’s alright to mock

if you’re one of the flock

but beware the outsider

the high-horse ‘n rider

for if you try it – them blokes just won’t buy it

and you’ll likely end up

with a shiner!


Ok – so they drive like French papies

but they do it with pride!

Just don’t break the bloody road rules

or rage’ll have your hide!


As to their English

the mother tongue’s obviously defective

So it’s up to them Aussies

and they’ve got it downright perfective!!


heh!  heh! heh!   xx A.

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Posted by MikeP-180526 - 16 years ago
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Posted by MikeP-180526 - 16 years ago

Angel ....  at least in Australia you can eat sushi until it comes out of your ears without taking out a bank loan.  And you can buy Vegemite (yuck!) if that's your thing!

Certainly the range of goods in Australian supermarkets is not that great,  South Africa is far better.  But Australia is improving and largely thanks to the influx of South Africans, many of our favourites are exported there, meaning that Australia now falls into my definition of a civilised country,  the crtieria for which are :

they drive on the right side of the road (right as in correct,  i.e left).Christmas falls during the summerthey speak English,  or an approximation thereofthe tea is drinkable and made with fresh milkyou can buy Mrs. H. S. Balls Chutney, Lunch bars, and Five Roses.


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Posted by angel-187474 - 16 years ago

Come on, geezer - be honest ... you mean la piquette et paté !?

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Posted by the_geezer - 16 years ago

MikeP, how can you say such outrageous things?!

To complain about the lack of food in French hypermarkets when half the world's population is starving is sheer callousness.

It's enough to drive me to the kitchen to grab some foie gras and Sauternes and sit and watch the Oxfam ads on tv...


The Geezer

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Posted by angel-187474 - 16 years ago

quote MikeP: "..(In fact there is no grass here.).." 

MikeP >> I adore your cynical sense of humour - you're always good for a giggle!

But to indicate the range and quality of goods here is 2nd rate ... crikey!  >>  you wouldn't want to go to Australia then, mate!!

xx A.

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Posted by MikeP-180526 - 16 years ago

Strange how perceptions vary.  I use Champion at Valbonne (the one on the roundabout towards Biot - I assume this is the one Brightstar means),  basically because it is conveniently on my route.  I find the staff pleasant and helpful and there is even one who packs my bags and speaks to me in passable Frenglish because she has been taken in by my 'helpless male' act and my exaggeratedly bad French  (so if anyone knows which cashier I mean,  please don't spill the beans!)

As far as service is concerned,  the grass is definitely greener in other countries.  (In fact there is no grass here.)  So is the range and quality of goods available.  Makes this place look pathetic.  In South Africa even the small supermarkets have a range of goods and choices that that would make the hypers here look like corner cafes.  It is also much cheaper, even when related to incomes ... but that's another story and very much off topic.

And as for a dirty tatty store with rude unhelpful staff,  try Super-U on the Plascassier roundabout.

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Posted by Brightstar-189376 - 16 years ago

Can't resist giving my few cents worth!

a) Darty:  I needed some software products and also some advice.  I tried La Fnac first (having checked all out on line) and couldn't even get a reply - just another large phone bill.  Darty in Antibes answered quickly, gave me the name of the right sales guy to help and put me straight through to him.  When we arrived. he was busy with a customer, but as soon as he was through, he couldn't have been more helpful.  What's more, the kit worked as we had planned.  But the actual process of purchasing goods is apalling - no-one including me had any idea of what you were supposed to do or where to go.  However, overall, I would say that I would return there to that particular store and probably try and find the same guy.  Didn't know they were owned by Kingfisher - tks for that nugget, St G!

b) Supermarket shopping in general:  this seems to be so variable.  Overall, I have found the service at Carrefour Antibes and Casino Antibes to be very good.  Valbonne Champion are downright rude, but they happen to be convenient.  HOWEVER - a recommendation is to invest in a freezer bag and a large, heavy duty shopping bag, available at Carrefour.  So much easier than trying to bundle stuff into those stupid lightweight carrier bags supplied. You get through check out way quicker.  The local suppliers in Biot are a delight to deal with, chatty, helpful etc - so whenever I can, I go and do a small shop in the village to supplemement the big one.

c) Grass is greener (as in UK not Grasse!).  I do misss some things at home - and am probably going back, not because of that, but work, however I find the thought of M&S an absolute delight . . . but know I will miss a lot more here!

I'll be back.

Brightstar x